A fellow multiple mom over at The Twinkies has a post up from a while back about how mom’s with multiples get gawked at and rude comments while out in public. For some reason this old post has started a new firestorm of blogtroversy (did I just make that one up?) The thing is, it amazes me to this day how much of a freakshow twins and higher order multiples are in public. I can’t take my two to Cost.co (by the way the ONLY place I know of where the carts have two side by side childseats – what’s up with that?) without feeling like I need a neon sign that says “Yes, they’re twins, NO they aren’t identical, etc, etc, etc…The thing is, it’s not so much that I mind people admiring my kids. Hell, I think they’re pretty damn cute myself! But people who say ignorant things like, “Are they natural twins?” or “Double trouble!” or “You’ve got your hands full” just have no clue how stupid they sound.
If you only know how hard it was to come by the beautiful twins, triplets, and other higher order multiples that we all have, you’d know how incredibly blessed we are and how every day we thank God for the families we have. Our hands might be full, but so are our hearts, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.
Twin moms all over the world field amazingly rude stares and comments every time we leave the house. And yes, some people are very well meaning and say nice things. But more often, people stick their foot in their mouths and then get irritated with us when we don’t have the time to sit and educate them on how all twins are natural and the differences between identical and fraternal and which ones run in families. (Fraternals run in families, and boy/girl twins cannot be identical – ever. No matter how much they look alike.) But to ever suggest, as some of the commenters over at Stacie’s have, that if we don’t want the attention we should just stay home, is simply wrong. There is no other adequate way to characterize it. If you are a multiple mom, and you like the attention, more power to you. The rest of us will rely on you to absorb the unwanted attention we receive. In the meantime, I’d just like to go to the store and go home and love my family and not be a traveling circus act, thank you very much.