The Big 3-0

No no, not me. Heck, I passed that one awhile ago.  No, not H.  She doesn’t like to admit it, but she passed it to. Although she won’t let me forget that I passed it first!

The babies. The babies will be 30 months on Thursday. I know that sounds dumb. But 30 months is 2 1/2 years exactly.  Halfway to kindergarten. Past the point where you count their age in months (well, unless you’re Dooce, but I’m not nearly that good).  This last weekend I cut bangs for J, because she’s constantly shoving her fine, blonde hair out of her eyes.  And just like that she went from this little pixie baby to a little girl.  The change in her look was startling.  Cute, but so much more grown up.

So in honor of the big 3-0, a few words from Mommy to the babies:

Dear N:
My dear sweet boy. Your laugh and your smile light my every day. You are able to make me smile no matter how bad a day it has been. You are so loving and I hope you never lose the complete abandon you express your love with. I love to hold out my arms to you and watch your face light up just before you take off running and jump (without slowing down) into me. That will never get old. I love to watch you delight in your accomplishments. The sound of your voice screaming, “Yay!!!! I a GOOD BOY! I DID IT!” makes my heart melt. Yesterday you laid in my arms after waking from a nap and I marveled at how big you are. You’ve grown so much from the little boy who pulled out his own vent tube in the NICU. I love how you reach for my hand when we are walking and I want you to know my hand will always be there to hold yours. You are my heart, little man, and a joy to spend every day with.

Dear J:
My little firecracker. You are my barometer. Through you, I am discovering more about myself than I ever realized I would. You reflect my emotions and attitudes and make me aware of where I am at – my stress level, my focus, my intensity. You encompass the extremes at both ends of the spectrum – when you are frustrated and angry there is no doubt we are aware of it. But you love just as strongly. Last night I snuggled with you as you struggled to decompress from the day and I kissed your arm. You grabbed my cheeks and kissed my face and nuzzled your head into my arm, leaving your hand on my face. You might be small, but you do everything big. From moment to moment it’s a surprise with you – and I just want you to know that you can be frustrated one minute and snuggly the next and it’s ok. Never let anyone tell you differently. You are a bright girl with a big spirit and I adore every minute with you. You are my little kindred spirit.

I can’t believe the two of you have been here with us 30 whole months. At the same time, it is difficult to remember life before you. And I can’t wait to see what’s around the next bend.

“I love you ever.”


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